The root of all evil..

I try to keep this blog upbeat and most time I think I do an okay job at it, but today it’s hard to find something positive to write about. Daniel and I got in an argument this afternoon and while I hate putting our arguments out there for the whole world to know about sometimes it’s therapeutic to know if anyone else goes through the same things we do. We have a great relationship, we only really argue about one thing and that’s the root of all evil in my opinion, money…

Daniel and I had two very different upbringings. We both had very loving parents, but mine tended to spoil me more than his did. He says he was never spoiled, although I have heard differently from people in his life. I always had the best of everything, growing up I had the best toys, when I was in high school I had clothes that were always trendy and in style. Even in college, I still got a new wardrobe every fall and spring. My parents spoiled me and it was a lifestyle I became accustomed to. Daniel liked other things, his parents bought him four wheelers and guns for hunting or the latest game system, he could care less about clothes.

Now that we are “grown ups” (I hate using that term, because even at 26 I don’t feel like a grown up), we have to pay for these things ourselves. I have curved my spending habits a lot, instead of shopping at Banana Republic and J Crew, I shop at Target. Instead of my hair costing almost $200 to get done, it only costs $40.. I don’t have to have MAC or Clinique make up anymore, I settle for for Cover Girl, but apparently it’s not enough.

With the economy and our situation (building a new house, facing a pay cut or possible lay offs), Daniel told me we really need to watch our spending even more. So that means no new clothes, no getting my hair done every six weeks and no going out to lunch during the week at work.

However today I bent the rules a little. My friend, Amanda, who works part time and is able to stay home with her boys for the most part, texted me and wanted to know if I could go to lunch. I agreed, but told her it needs to be somewhere cheap, so she suggested soup and salad at Olive Garden. Sounded good to me, until Daniel saw on our online banking website that I spent $10.25 at lunch. He flipped. I packed lunch, why didn’t I eat what I bought? I explained to him I hadn’t seen Amanda in forever and wanted to catch up. That wasn’t good enough. I got lectured from my husband on how we can’t go out to lunch anymore, how my Target trips have to stop, because we have to prepare for the what ifs..

What if we get that proposed 12.5 % pay cut (25% total to our household), what if we get laid off, what if one of us gets injured and we have to take off work without pay (our short term disability just changed, it doesn’t kick in until you are off work for 60 days instead of 20)? Then we have the new house we’re building, which we can afford (our mortgage will be the same as our rent), but Daniel wants to have a huge nest in savings just in case one of the above (pay cut, lay-offs) happens. I hate, hate living on a budget, but I guess he is right. I just wish sometimes we could go to the movies, or go out to dinner just me and him, without Cecilia, but that would mean paying for dinner plus paying for a sitter.

I know I probably sound like a baby about this, but I am not used to budgeting. I have a degree in Accounting and Finance and I can budget millions of dollars in my job, but when it comes to my personal budget I am a big failure, because I like new things, new clothes, new makeup and my biggest weakness, new things for Cecilia.
So now operation budget begins. I am not very happy about it, but I’ll be okay. What have you done to cut back?